well thats why i like him. because he makes you happy. on the other hand i think he masturbates too much while texting you.
I just put on my hot pinky lace thong... you know what that means! ;)
Oh god. Slutty you is on the run. Someone needs to alert the city.
Did you just see the Batmobile???
Must be January. Theres a fat chick on an elliptical wearing khaki capris. Someone doesnt own any workout clothes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just watched a special on porn, the business isn't doing so good. You may want to wait before you start your career
You are just a treasure cave of fabulous alcoholic ideas.
why the fuck would he compare you to sexy aquatic creatures?
Dude, she literally just asked me if her mac'n'cheese makes me horny. I think I found the one.
Either this is the best sandwich I've ever had, or my stomach is just relieved to have something in it that's not Red Bull or semen.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
By the way when you were super fucked up last night, you ate cat food and tried to tell me it was healthy for you
How long is enough time to schedule homosexual exploration... Like an hour?
I would also like you to tell your human bio class that I successfully smoked out the flu. 103 degree when I woke up yesterday. 100degree after one bowl. 4 more bowls and 16 hours later all that's left is a cough
I told him to not try to hang out with me ever again and now I regret it Bc im bleeding through my uterus and just want him to suck on my aching nipples
I just found a nug casually in my room under my duffel bag. Is this a sign I need help?
i think i'm just going to start having sex with his brother, he's much hotter and it would definately be less illegal.
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