Ps there is totally a drug addled prostitute in olympic pizza asking for change for a 100 bill
Let's just say he looked at my vagina like it was a rubics cube.
It's a sad day when you realize you are no longer above fucking in movie theater bathrooms.
I saw him on the jumbotron, its like god doesnt want me to forget his tiny penis
hot buttered vodka was not a success. on any level.
Already at the river; already getting fucked up. And yes that semicolon is legit because those are congruent statemests
dude, I convinced you I was your conscience for like 15 minutes last night. you weren't just "a little high"
I don't think you understand. I woke up under the car. At 3 am. In the club parking lot.
I have nothing to say other than the obvious 'we probably shouldn't have done that' and the less obvious 'i think you bruised my labia major' ...?
Idk what I'm more afraid of...checking my bank account or my STD results.
Grrr. Fine. You get oral for being unwrong.
I mean, she's batshit insane and once choked a guy with one hand but she's still MILF material in my book.
I wore the clothes I got arrested in last night to work today.....there is no where but up from here!
Idk but when you think about it the last time I did bottomless mimosas I ended up getting my nipples pierced so it might be fair
I'm just happy stripping was the reason you fractured your hand
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