PS - I'm in bed with an 18 yr old-am I a cougar?
No - puma.
they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
So I went out tonight...met a guy who slightly resembled my dad,huge creeper, he asked me to "hang out" so I gave him my moms number since he was more her type:)
You stuck your head out the window to puke and got hit with a mailbox.
it's kinda bad that we're already planning travel arrangements to his funeral
You do realize that we got a stripper to do the YMCA for us on the main stage... Right?
I have now added draft and wells specials that different bars have to my blackberry calendar.. Help me.
Overdraft my account again. Parents are starting to ask questions. What would go over better a gambling or drug addiction??
But the ghost of his schlong past haunts you
My Yoga instructor is playing the music from 'Requiem for a Dream' it makes me very reluctant to put my ass in the air
Ps we ordered a pizza at the pool today and I dropped the entire thing in the pool. We still ate it. #canthang
I peed sitting down because I knew standing was a lost cause
got a blowjob in the bar bathroom, got arrested for public intoxication, and found a big bag of weed on the ground on my walk home from the station. my friday night could have been a movie
I walked into my room last night at 4 am and there's a random dude in his boxers eating oatmeal on my futon. I looked at him and went to bed
... drunk me broke the coffee table?
STOP TALKING ABOUT YOURSELF IN THE THIRD PERSON. YOU DID THE THING.
Randomize
