plz talk dirty to me
before smithy murders me i need you to know 3 things. 1) i got with smithy's little sister last night. 2) i will always love you like my own brother. 3) smithy's little sis digs anal.
I just fell asleep with a sandwich in my mouth at Cosi..people definitely saw
you think the cum will come out of moms black shirt?
at a bar with my ex girlfriend.. both men AND WOMEN are hitting on her.. and not one has even looked at me
I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
great idea involving lots of fake blood and face paint, call me tomorrow.
This guys mom bought us a 24 pack and drove me and 8 others to a frat house... Hello moms weekend.
I don't even want to think about the kind of person who would shit in the street before 10pm on a Sunday.
He looks like he got hit by a weed-eater with chlamydia
Dude, you need to man up. You passed out before a PRESEASON game. It's a long season.
Why do I know about what dicks have been in your mouth but didn't know you had a dog? What kind of friends are we??
Don't come back. They don't have pants.
Oh god.
God has nothing to do with this.
if by making eggnog you mean drinking all the spiced rum, then yes, she's making eggnog
welp,tonight ive reached new levels. by new levels I mean,i showed some guys my boobs for water. on your tab.. the most pointless thing ive ever done. either we should hang out way more,or never again.
Randomize
