oh right, i forgot that not everyone has a go-to blowjob
How wet are you?
Ever heard of a U-boat?
I would describe it as pure and unadulterated shock, mixed with horror and a touch of nausea.
he made me have a moment of silence for the half of my ice cream cone i threw away.
I'm buying you potatoes, the least you could do is not ask any fucking questions and just say thank you.
somehow a sneeze triggered me puking over everyone in the car
you can't tell me it's over and send me pics of you and your cat?
There's no point in calling it Big Titties Tuesday if girls with big tits don't get anything special
I woke up at 4 am. Literally pissed. No idea what happened. I could have fucked a cow.
You were naked too, so it cancels out. We're straight.
I can say with 87% certainty that i received one of the world's five greatest blow jobs since the Coolidge administration on Saturday night.
I'm craving your dick and a microwave pizza
The night's not a success unless at least 60% of participants wake up with bite marks on their genitals the next morning.
I don't know what kind of parties you go to, but we should hang out more often.
Being forward is somethimes a problems. Like in sexual deity Kong.
I think you’re losing coherence.
I am
Talk shit all you want but with my new knife sharpener I have a lethal razor sharp pizza cutter. Fuck with me Mario I dare you!
Randomize
