i told her parents not too worry the way i do it girls dont get pregnant
just took my ibuprofen with ramen broth, yay college
Someone's playing Limp Bizkit out loud on the train. I think the decade reset it self.
we're at Rob's house and just invented the best drinking game ever....we are on Chatroulette and everytime we see a dick we all have to drink.
so this chick screams out the name doug is bed..not to later do i find out doug is her vibrator
hello competition
Remember in school when they told us our vag was made just the right size for our future husband? I must say I am enjoying trying to find that perfect fit.
Using your Catholic School education as an excuse for this? Why didn't I think of that?!
Working out to an exercise video on OnDemand. Also, drinking beer and eating cream cheese with a side of bagel in between stretches.
he said i ruined lesbian porn for him
I held his ankles while he hung off the top bunk attempting to get my pillow that fell off.
he went to find a bathroom and came back 10 minutes later with a fifth of bacardi, a pack of cigarettes, and two funnel cakes. he is a man among boys.
Are we going out tonight?
My conscience says no but my vag says yes
You keep saying things....but all I'm hearing is kegs
The shit show didn't end. it just relocated itself to my apartment instead of yours.
you also need to get my treadmill fixed.
We had sex to beyonce's "drunk in love" and then he order me pizza. It was perf
It seems that Coffee is the true alpha male.
Randomize