So now everyone thinks I don't know what a condom is
I woke up naked in my living room and my mom was next to me like we need to talk
Why didn't you tell me that Dad was a registered sex offender?
We were going to tell you eventually, how'd you find out?
Our school resource officer showed us how to use Family Watchdog and pulled up his picture.
Dude, Taco Bell gave me a free fiesta potatoes when I won a bet on wether I could fit the entire rim of a cup in my mouth.
I defriended her. I just can't support someone whose profile picture is of their water birth.
Im the proud new owner of the campus speed bump sign
I had to watch them play Salty Cracker. I have never seen a grown man cry with a boner before
I drove two hours just to throw up on myself today at the beach. My family saw the whole thing and my younger cousin cried
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
I'm crying and shaving my Bronco playoff beard
Ok. I'm gonna smoke some weed and look at some elephants without you then.
I will take a ruler to your dick so help me god
In my defense I didn't know there was concrete on the other side of that fence when I tossed him over it.
You're both fucking idiots and this is why I should never let you two drink alone.
Just got a handjob in the hospital
A new low.
after we fucked i left the room and when i came back he was patting his dick whispering "prouda you lil guy...prouda you"
Randomize