Your lack of dick hurts my anus. I hate your loverboy tactics.
R and i have drinken 4 bottles od red wine. By ourselfs
She wanted to fuck you. You threw up on her. Congrats.
doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
you know you go to a catholic school when you are rollin a joint with matthew 14:1-12
She got subburned last week and her bikini ties in the middle...when I took off her shirt, there was a sunburned bow between her boobs. Like a present. Happy birthday to me!
Someone apparently named 'eleaw' just text me asking if I had fun last night.
Drunk me was responsible for doing it, but sober me was definitely cheering him on
Dude. Apparently I just smoked some stuff that's used for Nigerian spirit quests.
I dont care if your mom convinced you it should be an abstinent christmas. I did horribly on finals and i'm out of booze, so you will get over her and FUCK. ME. NOW.
He had a step stool to get in to his bed!
I should not be so motivated by a penis, but I am
I was hoping for a marriage proposal... Or at least an offer to sleep in his bed.
I feel as though my head has drastically changed shape
I just discovered my new vice. Cotton candy vodka. Its like a carnival in my mouth, puking of the tilt-a-whirl included.
Randomize
