People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
so he came in my eye... should i throw out my contacts?
Mid thrust he tells me that we have bio together
So I fucked that hot french guy last night
You do know he's the one who threw up on our table, right? You get to clean it up.
new level of vanity: sex dreams about deep throating myself...
Your excuse of not making us Mac and cheese was that you couldn't find 6 cups of water...
His 21st birthday is in the middle of shark week, it's meant to be.
You know being hammered seven days in a row can do serious damage to your liver.
Text me on Monday and make sure I'm still alive
It feels like I'm being stabbed in the uterus with a rake. That night was totally worth it though. Thanks.
whats our policy on dating high schoolers?
we dont have a policy but im pretty sure the state of michigan does
Just rolled up to a matinee showing of THE HOBBIT. At the dollar theater. Alone. In sweats. With a fifth of sunnybrook and leftover pizza in a ziplock. There's a dude here in cape with his elderly mother. I'm handling this breakup FIIIIIINE.
Lesson learned. Don't roleplay with a real knife.
Is Oprah even human
All I got was pictures of my boss and dicks. So, that was the end of snapchat.
What started out as a one night stand ended in him texting me the next day, saying he thought he was gay.
We're hate flirting, damnit.
Randomize
