Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
I just Organized my jello shots by their colors in my mini fridge for the rest of the week. I'm going places in life.
can we take a shower together?
no need for the romantic shit. I'm a sure thing
my Prof for my bio lab has his lab coat collar popped. it's 8 am and im too hungover for this guy
I think I would be able to remember how to smoke but I can't seem to remember how to breathe.
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
I'm playing a game where i judge myself by whats in my cart. Also have 3 bright red giant buckets
Ps I think male models just broke down outside or maybe gay German sex travelers
He won't leave and I need to take a shit and vomit, quite possibly at the same time.
Seriously bro? Indoor roman candle wars? I guess I'll never see that fucking security deposit again
Incase you were wondering. Cooking naked turns into sex. Sex and cooking may lead to house fire....
My Sexting was not on an AP level
I guess "hi, I know your mom, she taught me in high school" is an effective pickup line
I need to get some goddam control over my hormones
Dude, the T Swift concert might not be so bad after all. Can you say milfs living vicariously through their teenage daughters? Score.
Randomize
