I just saw a pregnant woman with a cigarette and a beer walking into the Larry the Cable Guy show. I'm glad my taxes are paying her medical expenses.
WAKE UP. GET ME THE PILL. AND SAVE MY LIFE
I never doubt that you might be drinking at any moment.
I wanna be on tlc
Impossible. You are neither fat, fertile or fashionless.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's really hot. I think he's gonna be my reason to shave this winter.
Idk man I'm just a giant talking marshmallow ready to be toasted and dipped in chocolate
how many lesbians have to have their hearts broken before they realise I am not that kind of DJ
In other news, I apparently ate my retainers while rolling last night.
I mean there are things broken right and left, I woke up surrounded by dog statues, and we had a vodka bubble bath.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Lets just say...I plan on being a bigger shitshow than Miley Cyrus at the VMA'S
Also, you should've bet on Team Liver.
We won.
USA USA USA
then this guy just runs in screaming, "cant you see my daughter pissed herself???!!!" and that was the start of my 2016.
How do you politely tell someone to get out of your house in Russian
It’s gonna be hard being interviewed by this girl without remembering the time she showed me her nipple piercings at Dylan’s party
Want to have dinner and we can talk about how my vagina can make you feel better?
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