I had a dream last night where you were a transsexual in a low cut blue dress with lovely long brown hair. You were very pretty. I hope you are well.
If the pens lose tonight I'm gonna drive to Detroit and burn 8 mile to the ground.
Actually I may do that regardless. Probably get my own holiday.
when did we get to this "texting at random" level on friendship?
Seriously just heard: "we need some good ass wine. how bout this swa-vig-non blank"
hahahaha. Oh virginia: where the south begins
careful of the bathroom.... theres some drunken ninja turtles in there....
I have no words
Neither did my mom, when she walked in on me squating with my balls in a cup of hot water.
FUCK YOU. AH. FUCK BOTH OF US MORE BOOZE.
MAS TEQUILA.
I just tried on my "outfit" for tonight and I should just wear sweatpants and a sign on my face that says I like it in the ass. That would be more comfortable
we came into the house to find you doing shots by your self and when we told you to stop you locked yourself in the bathroom...
did I at least say anything...
you meowed at us and said you're a cat and cats drink for a living
Well, I'm hung over and my penis hurts - two signs of success
He had a drawn-on fu manchu and now my vagina has one too.
I'm high and having a granola buffet this has got to be the healthiest I have ever been
We grabbed as many adult diapers as we could and made a run for it.
I'm really ok with inappropriate relationships. They are my favorite of all the relationships. No need to be timid. For crying out loud.
How drunk are you?
Completed.
Randomize
