your head's too prwtty to be stuck in the books
we went to that german restaurant and drank out of the boots. Then I threw up into one
My life has hit rock bottom, I'm watching a movie on lifetime about retarded people falling in love. And I'm jealous of their relationship.
obama could have borrowed sotomayor's dick when he threw out that that first pitch like a girl last night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I asked about his 3 inch scar on his chest. It's from when he had to castrate a bull on the estancia. Apparently this is how good bull meat is made.
and then he publicly announced her herpes on facebook.
My passport was stamped in Canada two weeks ago. One step closer to uncovering wtf happened that night
The thing about being single is like Sunday morning sex is nice but so is Sunday morning eating Nutella from the jar in your underwear
Currently rolling a blunt in the bathroom of Planned Parenthood
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
SOME DUDE PUT OUT FOR A MCCHICKEN AND YET YOU STILL WON'T FUCK ME
I brought an already opened bag of trail mix from home to snack on today. Some motherfucker ate all the m&ms out of it. I hate my roommates
I get so sad when I watch him slowly destroy his life with whiskey and cocaine. Then he bites my neck and I just want to fuck him. I can't help it.
Do I masturbate or eat a pound of matazah. Alissa help what do I do??
It's beautiful. It's what jesusxwants. I should send you a pic of my boobs out of friendship
We met behind our asshole boss's back with the intent to oust him from the company. If this revolution is a success, bring nachoes.
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