just spent the last 4 hours searching ex-girlfriend porn to make sure there are no photos of me
he said "cool" when i took off my bra and proceeded to stare wideeyed at them the ENTIRE time. it was like sleeping with the kid i showed my boobs to for the first time in 6th grade.
I just did my online traffic school at the bar. No biggie.
I'm hungover as fuck. My vagina hurts. I locked my keys in my car. It's about 93* outside. We're having sex in the pool when I get home
We need to go to the store an get depends. I really don't want to be bothered with the bathroom this weekend.
thanks for being the calm eye of my shit storm.
I just sent you a google doc listing all the reasons why I should stop hooking up with him. Feel free to add to it.
I HAVE A BLACK EYE FROM A DILDO!! IM GETTING MARRIED TOMORROW! THIS IS NOT A MISSUNDERSTANDING!
Some guy just showed up at my door to return my bikini top. EXPLAIN NOW
THINK! exactly how many raw eggs did you color and hide in my apt.
the bandages come off on Tuesday. we can try out my new breasts then.
You're not horrible. Thank you for my pandas.
Yeah but you let me touch your butt. You're clearly the winner.
Who loses their virginity to fucking Flo Rida
U dont jog and buy condoms n bulk
Randomize
