where are you
in your bedroom
how did you get in
your wife…
WTF
I want to have your abortion
The funny thing is... I'm about to go to the store to buy WD-40 and condoms... That's it.
And before you ask they are unrelated purchases.
so i decided to listen to you and went ahead and slept with him. you owe me 3 minutes
...She just said, "We've been blessed with good drugs lately."
I'm doing it for my vagina. You should understand that
please dont let the old guy in the wheelchair see you when you wake up
That's fuckin bs. I had the bouncers beat by 30 yards til that dumbshit on the moped stopped in front of me.
Don't be alarmed at the kitchen mess. I had to shoot the fire extinguisher on the toaster oven, one quick blast. It was a matter of safe over sorry.
What's the politically correct way of saying you've made someone your bitch?
She's like the King Midas of sexual confusion. Everything she touches turns to gay.
Our sibling relationship has really blossomed into a wonderful mutual acceptance of sluttyness
There were 7 of us cowering in the kitchen because you were swinging a giant, pink double headed dildo around like a nunchuk and hitting anyone who came near you with it.
We single women of America need to make America great again by refusing to fuck anyone who supports Trump.
How many of my Tinder dates can my Christian roommate accidentally meet in the hallway at 3am before she's horrified and moves out?
Randomize
