I stuck it in and pulled it out
Did she like it?
She giggled?
She liked it
we ike ciroccccc we love patroneeeee shost shothosthsothosthostsssss veryboyddddyyyy
go home
the bouncer made me realize that puking in line does not get you in any faster
there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
Please fuck him. And then let me tell her. And then let me protect you from the knife she pulls from her Ed Hardy purse. Please.
Well I say she's a whore. All four of her kids have different last names.
BUT, one is Johnson and the other is Johnston. She gets some credit for that
I made two strippers play rock paper scissors to see who would give me a lap dance last night
I'm not sure drinking my way through west nile virus is the best idea. Oh well, already committed to that plan.
I've decided he is effectively a mouth, hands and cock held together by bad ideas and compliments, and I'm OK with that.
I just tried to pay for a coffee with a dollar and a necco wafer.
I don't know what happened. His phone, shirt, shoes, and the condom wrapper are here but he isn't. I don't even know how to get a hold of him right now
I'm out of prison. Wanna start a band?
You said "this is only my eighth drink" with like 6 separate drinks
in mid sex he pointed out my great gatsby tattoo and we started discussing themes and metaphors from our fave fitzgerald novels
you need to stop fucking English majors
When the bouncer doesn't let you in... Don't ask him where he works so you could file a complaint with the better business bureau... It only proves him right.
It's 5 PM...and you're 35. Congrats on being an amazing human being.
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