3:47a: I take it you're not on your way over
so later when i'm crying over him remind me that he once called his penis "senor weeper"
there's got to be a less slutty way to tell him the baby isn't his
wait a second. did i just remember you the other night referring to your tits as tia and tamara.....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Maybe it's the vicodin, but all I wanna do is hunt wild hogs.
Lets start a coed nudist frat/sorority. It would be amazing. Or just an orgy club. It would also be amazing
When we were finished I asked him how long it had been since he'd cum that hard. He thought really hard for a while before telling me his brain forgot how years worked.
Turn on the Discovery Channel
Lets fuck to motorcycle gang fighting
Nothing says Panama City like condoms washing up on the shore.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh ya, I forgot to tell you, last night I woke up to the sound of you peeing on the floor next to the fridge, didn't remember until now. Have fun at Dayton!
Well if your hearts not big enough, your penis certainly is. Just have a threesome
A picture of a damn cupcake brought back 3 fuckboys
I fucked him on shrooms. His dick looked like a missile and he had snakes coming out of his ears. It. Was. AWESOME!
I had to explain to an ER nurse that I burned my dick playing onion ring toss today, your social awkwardness hardly compares.
I can't be sure but I think I slept with a clown last night...
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