So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
Tried to buy Xanax from my boss last night. Wrong Mike.
You kept shouting "Relax and take notes" every time before you would hit the blunt
The door to door salesmen do not expect you to be drunk at 3 in the afternoon
had to split buying plan b over two cards. I will no longer challenge people to get on my level
A Bum and I jusst hugged. its not even 8 pm.
While looking for an apartment, I've realized that the way I rate balconies is on the "how easy would it be to smoke weed here" scale.
What other scale is there?
I was talking about you wanting my dick, but that works too
I have cobwebs on my vagina for halloween. And bats fly out when I open my legs.
stalking the twitter feeds of girls who have fucked my current fuck buddy makes me glad we use condoms
The extent of "getting it in" was this creepy guy sticking his finger in my bellybutton
all my money is vodka money
I have never read a truer sentence.
She called it a palate cleanser. She and her friend dike it out once a year before returning to dick
Together or do they pick up? How far do they go? IS AN AUDIENCE PERMITTED? GODAMIT ANSWERS MAN!!!!!!
I was amazing, unlike anything he's ever experienced. I somehow made him feel young and old.and he never felt old before. He feels I will literally kill him. With my magic, lethal vagina.
I am getting off work an hour early just to watch you drink. Never let it be said that I don't love you.
Randomize
