...just for future reference, one Four Loko can fits PERFECTLY in a venti iced coffee cup from Starbucks
we took shots then she made me eat a dill pickle with cream cheese wrapped in a piece of turkey.
Uh oh. Middle aged belly dancers. And they just got out swords. Shit is about to get real.
Idk. Last year there was an ice luge, glow in the dark jungle juice, and lots of naked people. I feel like I'll get pregnant just thinking about going to that party.
God I miss you. I want to fuck your face... Then do all the girly cuddly shit too.
Just seen a chubby version of you. Nearly kidnapped her. Perfect woman
i wore a power symbol belly button ring just so i can drunkenly tell him that he turns me on. i dont care if it works i think its classy
Hooked up with a girl in the dorm laundry room tonight. And got invited to go to Vegas for free. That's how today's going.
Am I supposed to confront my 52-year-old boss/mother of 3 about the fact that we matched on Tinder?
I thought you might think I was an idiot who thought cock rings prevent STDs,
When Pitbull's songs sum up your life... you know it's time for some serious life changes.
The poop emoji wasn't even in my recents. Does that mean I'm growing up?
But like it was sooo bad! At one point he tried to flip me over and he fell off the bed
Van sex tonight? No need to tell me how classy that sounded.
I think every girl deserves a pregnancy scare. Because then it just feels like such a priviledge to be bleeding out of the vagina.
I legit just did a jig towards my box of tampons.
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