I'm not upset with you; I'm upset with Fox News.
I would give away a ton of these clothes but I doubt there are any homeless people who dress as slutty as me
and he thought i came like four times in 2 mins. my leg just kept cramping up
I'd suck anything for a pizza right now
I'm relatively certain my chiropractor just judged me for admitting that my back is misaligned from the sex we had last night...
Just got to school and somone already mentioned the amount of cereal im carrying.
He started to notice that i sleep with every girl he calls dibs on.
Why do I feel like the only way for this trip to end is alcohol poisoning?
he made his penis look like a sprinkler when he was coming. it was pretty cool actually.
Just received a visit from the Ghost of Bad Decisions Past. Kind of weird 90% of the flashbacks happened in the same sixteen month span, the rest happened at Taco Bell.
There should be a company that sends nadgrams. They're like candy grams except the recipient gets kicked in the balls.
I would of joined had I not blacked out last night and ran around naked breaking things till 4 am
Your dick is going to fall off. Be careful or you'll get callouses. A workingman's dick.
So, just how hungover are you?
Not at all, surprisingly.
That has to be your X-Men power.
THERE'S MORE TO LIFE THAN JUST MISSIONARY
Randomize
