he just had his sister send me a message about how he's not a creeper
Was his mother too busy breastfeeding him to do it?
He tried to write down the address for the cab on half a bagel.
i dont care how hungover you are, go back to the frat house and get him. HE IS 11.
I feel the need to clarify that I did not show her my vagina.
I don't care if we have to swim home from the bar, Im not gonna sit home in the dark and read some fucking book
Hope your thanksgiving is a complete blowjob festival.
So who won the naked front yard Olympics last night?
Well my tits are spray painted gold & i have what i think r the Olympic rings shaved in my vag !!!!!!!SO its safe to say i won something ....
I don't know if I'm feeling really nervous right now or just extremely horny.
you got coffee,laid,and a sandwich. that never happens when I work
downside - we got stuck at the intersection before the santa clause parade started and had to wait for it to end. upside - i got frontrow seats and a blow job to the santa clause parade.
Went out with the family last night and some 40 yr old lady wanted to take me home. My mom was not happy with me
I don't know. I'm drunk and dressed as a pirate but ill do the math tomorrow morning.
You came in last night, ate an entire avocado in silence, and then told me I should never accept rides from strangers. Not sure I even want to know what happened to you last night!
It's times when I'm naked but also want to be platonically social that I miss you the most.
We met behind our asshole boss's back with the intent to oust him from the company. If this revolution is a success, bring nachoes.
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