I smell stomach acid.
What kind of soap washes out shame, bad decisions, and whiskey?
Irish Spring?
I knew we should have skipped class earlier, my lab partner is drunk from last night and making up his own experiments.
They are literally fucking next to the DJ Booth to a techno Remix to Pacman. She is going waka waka waka. WHY ARE YOU NOT HERE FOR THIS?!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If you have a glass table... Put it up. I don't wanna hurt myself again, I just got my stitches out...
Whatever. I'm just trying to get my dick sucked while taking online harmonica lessons
trapped on the roof of the strip club. help
This is John, I met you downtown last night.
Oh, ok.
This is the cop that kept you out of trouble last night
It's a hurricane, not a zombie apocalypse. WHY DID YOU BUY SHOTGUNS?!?!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We can put you in charge of something
I can be in charge of being more wasted than anyone there so everyone feels comfortable being ridiculous
You couldn't remember her number so you tried to dial her name into your phone. Once you realized you didn't know her name, you dialed 7 random numbers
You invented a drink at the bar and named it Boner Soup. It was like an even trashier version of a long island iced tea
Hell no. Last time I used a Slip N Slide I ended up with bruised ribs, a broken fence and the hatred of a half naked girl with a sprained wrist.
he just fucked me for my cheese..
should i be that dick who brings a carpet in an uberpool
Why are you moving a carpet?
it's unimportant
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