I wanna bring you to show and tell
Its not like he dircectly choose a cheeseburger over sex, it was more like I said seductively "I really appreciate this and I'm going to make it up to you anyway I can" and he replied "i want a bacon cheeseburger"
i guess he just knew i was going to sleep with him either way
seagrams + popov + pineapple + milk. there, ur search for worlds worst drink is over. you're welcome
So I've come to the conclusion that I would cry if I had an ugly baby.
And when we woke up we made beer pancakes. Great start to a family picture day.
The lid of our salsa is promoting a contest that ended in July '09
quit making up holidays to get me to go drinking with you
At some point we were all eating banana flavored rolling papers.
I didn't want to have to tell you this, violating our brother/sister code not to discuss these things but: for the love of christ stop inviting that 21 year old idiot I slept with for six months to EVERY PARTY WE THROW.
Pitchers of shots should be outlawed. I've puked more than i've breathed in the past half hour.
I dunno. Last time I went there I had got sexually propositioned by a Belgian prince.
I feel like a pile of chihuahua shit that got eaten by a Great Dane who puked it up and then set it on fire.
Sarah was butt-chugging wine and diarrhea'd all over the wall
You just wait. When you see me foam roll naked, you're going to lose your mind.
jump out the window naked night went bad
Randomize