i just pooped in tubberware. not a proud day
he told her he was actually impressed that she had fucked more people in this house than the four dudes living in it.
so the photographer said "let's get a picture of the cousins" so we posed together, and then he said " lets get a picture of the couples" So we posed together.
I come back upstairs and she's leaning over sink full of vomit saying 'oh my god it's the chili'
No. I'm too high for this. I gotta focus my mind for my future Hooter's interview
Yeah...don't think he was sober. He kept screaming "I fucking love this game!". It was his Chase app.
We've been walking through the woods for two hours, he just keeps taking pictures. At least we'll remember this tomorrow.
I just got caught impersonating a t-Rex by my boss. Sadly he wasn't fazed by my behavior and acted like it was normal.
See? I told you no boy in roller skates could be entirely straight.
Still trying to figure out where I was when someone broke the lawn chair and put it in the bathroom.
How did it feel to just observe all the people blacking out usually you're on the other end of things
I felt like I was at the zoo
Just looked for hours for the remote. Found it in my purse. I need to drink less.
I'm disgusted with myself. Who goes down on their Uber driver? This asshole
He was publicly touching my boobs before I even knew he's a famous World Cup skier.... That's how hot he was
yeah....try hearing them in person. it sounds like two muppets going at it
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