R you on birth control?
No, why?
...no reason
Google if cops ever smoke weeds and then bust them. I need to know immidiately.
so i told her that taking semen on the face helps make your skin smoother.
and?
luckily she was drunk enough to believe she had really bad acne...
I spit up blood this morning
That's vegas.
they shut off the water. shaving my legs with soda. that desperate.
no. the fact that it's halloween completely overrides the fact that it's sunday. youre going out whether im dragging your boring ass or not.
He thinks that since we have been dating six months, that he can do the helicopter with his penis. Not okay.
He ran five blocks just to watch me and my best friend make out. I think he's a keeper.
I just had a flash of memory of me asking all of the girls if they were on their periods. If they said yes I said it made us moon sisters.
Just finished off half a bottle of vodka. Can't take in anymore liquids so I ate 3 spoonfuls of your powdered gatorade to fight off the hangover. Wish me luck and check me for a pulse when you get in!
That's a good 5 hours of "I have no fucking idea what I did".
he's a ginger AND was born with 2 holes in his penis. sleeping with a rare species & I LOVE THE THRILL
I thought the first time I got peed on it would be by a baby...
He just said "I can't wait to penetrate you tomorrow" I sat in silence for a second...he attempted to save it by saying "I can't wait to enter you".
I am now banned from the bar... Because you got head from my ex in the woman's restroom
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