Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
You're the host. Of course you wear the diaper. It's like wearing the pants.
Clothes are such an inconvenience.
Thanks for stopping me from doing a one man keg stand by myself clad in only a towel. that probably wouldve ended badly.
Yeah, all the sudden I heard a loud "ding" and realized I had been passed out on the dorm elevator for about an hour....
we found her in my closet eating a clove of garlic.
We're trying to decide between cracker barrel an the ER
This whole situation could've been avoided if you would've just let me open the beer
I assume it was your influence that had me go from DD to waking up out on the deck with one eyebrow shaved off??
By the power invested in me, I now pronounce your taco to be meaty. Meaty taco meaty taco meaty meaty meaty taco.
Went to a date party without a date and had a threesome wooops
Me, him and the recently stolen carpet walked down the road and into the strip club. We had to check the carpet with our coats, it didn't mind missing out too much, later the door guy at Subway held carpet during late night sandwich selection.
If one of us has to be polite I guess I won't sneak out while he's in the shower
I just showed this kid my nipples to work my shift tmw
just took a pregnancy test before I went out drinking. if that's not drinking responsibly Idk what is.
Randomize