It's pouring out. I am cold, wet, and miserable.... Kind of reminds me of our sleepover last night.
even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
Girls don't like it when you cum inside them and then discuss baby names.
i have to go see a new gyno today. he's a male. i just took 3 shots of tequila. its almost like freshman year... drink alcohol, meet a strange man, let him play with my vagina.
So I was throwing up in this fancy toilet at a party last night, when he decided it would be funny to flush it. It was a beday. I had to walk out with toilet water and regurgitated rumpleminze all over my face and shirt.
I'm at the house listening to vengaboys alone. Please come home.
She had been watching Bad Girls Club where the annoying girl always says "I RUN L.A.". After she got wasted she kept going up to strangers at the bar yelling "I RUN FAYETTEVILLE." I peed in her drink.
we had incredible sex, then he proposed with the vibrating cock ring
Ladies, we have an appointment at David's Bridal aurora this coming Sunday at 3pm. And an appointment at where ever tequila is served at noon.
Nothing is more important than the last pool party of the season. Call in sick or gay or something.
I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
Finally hooked up w/ that yoga instructor chick. Got a little more than I expected. Like a full on bush more than I expected. How do you tell a girl that her bush scares you?
Breaking into his house to steal the sheets I'd drunk pissed on before he got home was not how I wanted to be spending spring break
You've got to be fucking kidding me. Do you think "Husband drunkenly pees all over floors" is reasonable grounds for divorce? So pissed off right now.
The moment I said this burrito on my nuts feels really good is the moment I knew I was drunk