ADVERTISEMENT

• (248): View more from Michigan

  i've got a dick and you've got a pussy....what is the problem??

  Fav 14 3985 1455

  share tweet
  

• (703): View more from Virginia

  i just told my boss to make it rain at camelot later...what is wrong with me?

  Fav 13 1374 743

  share tweet
  
ADVERTISEMENT

• (702): View more from Nevada

  Just seen a scantily clad pirate with 2 36 packs of natty ice on a bike riding with no hands. If she doesn't hit a speed bump she's golden and should be on the next Americas got talent.

  Fav 20 5735 1310

  share tweet
  

• (419): View more from Ohio

  Tuesday night just isn't my ideal coke binge night.

  Fav 6 1138 2510

  share tweet
  
• 

  23 Strangest Things That Gave Dudes A Boner

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (859): View more from Kentucky

  The arresting officer told me "you probably get this a lot, but you look like anthony kiedis".

  Fav 9 3462 1380

  share tweet
  

• (210): View more from Texas

  when someone at the bar asked you a question all you knew how to say was "chug-a-lug"

  Fav 7 1878 856

  share tweet
  
ADVERTISEMENT

• (403): View more from Alberta, CA

  Hahah fuuuck, bag pipers played around me while I threw up. Literally

  Fav 1 1901 883

  share tweet
  

• (513): View more from Ohio

  They get 5 minutes to wear their speedos at the wedding

  (1-513): View more from Ohio

  Oh my god I'll have to be really drunk for that

  Fav 3 1534 787

  share tweet
  

• (410): View more from Maryland

  fat chick, vomit on the dog, and three unidentifiable pills in my ear. all in the same ear. what the hell happened after the guests showed up?

  Fav 3 837 1579

  share tweet
  
• 

  These 21 People Shouldn’t Be Giving Dating Advice

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (951): View more from California

  DO IT, or I'll send you pictures of my hickey to remind you of your loneliness

  Fav 4 1031 716

  share tweet
  

• (504): View more from Louisiana

  From what I can tell at a cursory glance, it seems that last night I fell asleep on string cheese and it melted into my bra.

  Fav 2 664 1304

  share tweet
  
ADVERTISEMENT

• (410): View more from Maryland

  i feel like i should invite him over so he can cockblock my roommate one last time before he graduates. for old times sake, ya know

  Fav 1 1094 495

  share tweet
  

• (214): View more from Texas

  Oh and an honorable mention for your father's porn collection. Things I'll never forget.

  Fav 1 721 731

  share tweet
  

• (570): View more from Pennsylvania

  I think you might be the first man ever to describe getting a blowjob as "neat"

  Fav 1 71 99

  share tweet
  
ADVERTISEMENT

• (425): View more from Washington

  How do you tell a vegan you want him to stuff you like a turkey?

  Fav 4 92 11

  share tweet
  

Randomize