It's not a real calculator it's a math calculator
Just saw truck nuts on a handicap conversion van
Im going to bring a boy home tonight, and not tell him that I have my period. So when he tries to fuck me, I say no, and look really classy. Then he thinks I'm marriage material. So I give him head.
Watching Miami Social reminded me of how much I miss snorting coke with burger king straws in a life guard hut on the beach until we noticed someone was drowning.
Did you save them?
Who?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It had been so long since my last time that it was easily a double helping of stomach pancakes. I think she was mildly impressed.
just found his boxers balled up inside my tights, hidden in my freezer. damn i love college.
He told me I just kept sending him the word sex and dollar signs.
The police woke me up so they had no choice but to see my morning wood.
When I die I just want my headstone to my name, date of birth-death, and TEQUILA!!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just banged your ex. So it really is 'him, not you' in that he's gay. Rodeo champion gay.
if i ever get to the point where i am moaning when i pee, please do the honorable thing and kill me.
She was here for a threesome... She doesn't have to put the new roll of toilet paper on the dispenser. She can leave the new roll wherever she wants!
You don't feed me, fuck me, or fulfill me.
You threw away your W2 to make more room in your purse for liquor.
Really dude? drunk texts at 9 in the morning? its wednesday
Randomize