How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
and parents always said I was only motivated by money. Pfft they forgot vodka.
She wants her shit back. Clearly she missed the cheaters-get-their-shit-ritually-burned clause.
So then I sent a pic msg of the Magnum XL box to her friend
Mike and I just ate the lobster we found in the toilet
i saw his dick when we were four, so thats kind of ruined for me now
Your braces fetish is going to end up biting you in the dick.
He's trying to get everyone in the bathtub for a team meeting about how we're gonna find his car. Which is parked outside. Think we should cut him off?
If you hear screaming in the middle of the night, bat got loose. Call poison control immediately and explain rabies
Honestly I think at this point I purposefully schedule nothing on Sundays anymore so I can spend all day wallowing in my shame.
It's like we're in an emotionally distant three-way and there's not even sex to show for it.
Hey, you should go to your facebook ASAP... i'm guessing you're wasted but you just uploaded a picture of someones dick...and everyones taking bets now if its Rick or Mikes..
It's time you knew: I have been dating your probation officer for 7 months. Pretty certain he's THE ONE. So, thanks for being a criminal.
can you bring the lube to algebra tomorrow
I am so horny. It's like all the stress of finals week has relocated to my vagina.
Randomize
