While she was crying about breaking up, he looked at her through his fork and said "of course she's upset, she's in jail." Having sex with him tonight.
I woke up and my clothes were soaked in the shower and I was wearing a Ghostbusters uniform. I'm shocked she hasn't left me yet.
Getting blown during the Cavs game doesn't make it any less depressing.
i want the original willy wonka imagination song to come on when i take a girl to my room
do you remember yelling at the waitress that you were a power bottom?
I have fiberglass splinters all over my hands and woke up with a sign that says PUMPKINS in my room.
Fair enough. Everyone has some guilty pleasures. Yours is yourself
Is it possible to rally from a drunken seizure?
I have to take a quiz before midnight. Trying to decided if its a better idea to take it now when I'm stoned or later when I'm drunk.
When we tried to make a video I set the camera to 3sec pictures accidentally so instead of a movie we have a flipbook of our sex.
if a girl cums in a dorm room and no one hears it did it really happen?
We did it to 80's cardio music. Talk about a workout.
Seltzer and cocaine. Life is flawless right now.
why the hell did we go to a rave last night?
we didn't?
definitely went to a bar with strobe lights
JENNIFER. You passed out in a toilet with a color changing light in it.
I was peer pressured into smoking weed by a bunch of LGBTQ teenagers
Randomize
