so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
He practically bottle-fed me Jameson, like I was a baby chimpanzee on those nature specials.
I'm laying here in fetal position. I feel like a traffic cone
... I went down on him at the movies. I feel like Alanis Morisette.
I haven't seen her in ages, how is she?
Well I woke up next to her this morning so I guess I would say she could be doing better
I AM NOT THE MAN IN THIS RELATIONSHIP.
It's shit like this that makes people think we're gay.
Talk about an dramatic entrance, girl rolled up on a stolen bike and was wearing heels and a dress, through it on the ground and said "you guys want a bike?" Of course i jumped on that shit, any sane person would!
Seriously, I look like I crawled out of a bog. Succeeding at being as undateable as possible.
We had sex during an intermission, then the second period. The bruins better win. Missing a period isn't worth having sex with him
did I ever tell you about my gay jesus theory?
His mom said he was in the ER and asked for prayers and positive thoughts. Apparently, me wishing the clap on him is not what she had in mind.
He said did you just interrupt me midsentence to admire another man's penis?
i mostly like you because you have a nice nose and that's an important trait to pass on to my future children
I'm on A4A looking at dick pics while the CEO is on the phone trying to convince me not to leave the company
For the love of god, if any of you are up, bring me pants.
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