love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
We are walking down to the lake and then i dont know. Where did you sleep?
Places.
Plural? Please tell.
The cop only confirmed I'm .22% Irish. Then I threw up on him.
She had her laptop open and there was microsoft word opend and all was written was "no italianoo"
its not fair. if i was a guy, i'd be getting a high five for banging two in one night.
It was like getting head from an anaconda
Listen up tinkerbell, You're gonna come to the bar, hit on some fat chicks, and step up when I punch someone in the face.
She's planning a December wedding, I'm planning on a June breakup.
Goddamnit, guys. I got lube all over my kindle.
If there was a category for "most likely to end up a serial killer" in your high school yearbook then I'm sure you would have won it
Concept: I never actually flirt with anyone, I'm just a bitch and some people find it endearing
I think he is using me to sort through his relationship issues, past and present. I did not sign up for this. All I want is booty. Am I the dude in this relationship?
I might be a bit longer... I found a hot guy at the grocery store, so I'm following him and buying stuff that he's buying
And tell your penis that we can hang out tonight for sure.
It actually wasn't the first time that a guy I just met ate me out in the back seat of his car in a starbucks parking lot in the middle of the day.
Randomize
