we just watched the ball drop on the spanish channel. best mistake of my life.
You came on your own forehead. Just wanted to remind you that.
wanna play who's drunker? I just made macaroni & cheese taco and offered it to the pizza Guy as a tip.
Oh my God, I want him to live with his face in my vagina forever.
Trust me I was high for like 5 years...I got this
One day. I will touch his hair. I'm curious if it'll be like a soft cloud.
I knew it would be a shit show so I just went ahead and took plan b before I even got there. How's that for responsible?
IM WEARING A FLAG
So that's a no to the clothes then
FLAG
His flight is delayed. Mother Nature is delaying me from sex.
Seriously, it's 5am. STOP CREEPIN and START SLEEPIN!
I think we can say happy hour is successful when you have frosting and southern comfort in your hair.
Bro I needs to be rescued in 30 mins...prfeebly someone died in a car accident needs to be the excuse
So much for no-infidelity-fridays....
Idk but when you think about it the last time I did bottomless mimosas I ended up getting my nipples pierced so it might be fair
I'll text you tomorrow when I'm not in someone's torture cave if I don't by noon call for help.
Randomize