if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
You picked the wrong day to call in sick. She's wearing the librarian glasses today.
I feel like I just won at life, no connection sex and free 12 pack of beer after. Does life give out trophies, if so I want a big one.
he asked me if i had ever jacked off high and then referred to it as a "man-to-man question"
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
i think i have that disease where you wake up in strange places drunk.
I might have to break the "you stay out of my sister and ill stay out of yours" pact that i have with tim
yea, there's something about a stripper whipping you with your own belt that makes you think
This is the high leading the old right now
Cry into your wine glass and then drink the tears, it's like the fountain of youth
I need to go back to work. I've had so much sex since the shutdown started. last night we tried and a little flag came out saying "nothing is left in here try a week later"
honestly dont worry about it, its not the first time ive injured myself on a potted cactus during sexual relations with a woman
Last night I was introduced as the Picasso of getting fucked up so I obviously had to live up to it by chugging long islands
I knew he was a classy dude because when I told him my name was Jen he said "Gin? Like Gin & Juice?"
That wasn't even sex. That was a fuckoning
...did you just create a word for what we did?
Randomize
