brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
today's thought: if you're naming your fb album "wEdDiNg dAy!!!!!!" you're too young to get married
The world would have a new energy source if someone would just take a blacklight to the backseat of that slut's car
Wife passed out. Doing shots with the hot bartender... Don't tell me I don't know how to celebrate a 1yr anniversary
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
I don't know what possessed you to do that, but you have to give the stripper more money before you try to check her oil or they are going to throw us out every time you do that.
He tried to spell out "PROM?" in his cum on my stomach during sex. It was terrible
well did you say yes?
You need to braveheart it on Monday. Blue face paint and a loin cloth screaming freedom in your front yard.
He tried to take a picture of me naked but only got my ass. I don't know his name but if my butt is a guys wallpaper, that's the one I boned.
He asked me how france is treating me
Tell him you got so much dick you may never come back to the US. That ought to keep him away
also had sex in his sister's princess style bunk bed.
but you are a princess that one was appropriate.
you never un-have a 4some
Just got thrown out of the club for making condom water balloons. I'm not ashamed.
Scary. I hope people take me seriously. Maybe I should black out less to be sure
Peru was great. He sent me a text after thanking me for my amazing morals which confused me but made me oddly proud...then he texted a correction. He meant my amazing oral. Sadly this Made me prouder. Fuck u bitches and ur morally inhibiting gag reflexes.
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