SECOND walk of shame from the westside Hilton, SECOND foreign family w kids staring at me in my dress, glitter purse, spiky heels and booze breath. I said I was going to church. More confusion.
I wish life had little blips of pornography
I'm getting drunk watching the disney channel. Is this a main reason why we aren't together anymore?
I had to put my glasses on last night to watch porn. SO getting lasik with my tax returns this year.
I know it is almost summer when the students in my night class start showing up drunk.
The best thing about my promotion is that I now have an office with a door. I can take my naps in peace instead of leaning my head against the stall in the bathroom.
I can't believe they pay you six figures. I hate you.
Did strip banana grams actually happen last night
the tv said "its small, its comfortable..." and i started laughing... safe to say he lost any dignity he had left...
Oh my God, that is a gorgeous man. And I wasn't even gay until five minutes ago.
Lest we forget our veterans. Also that two years ago I lost my virginity on this day in a hot tub. Go me for being the worst person on earth.
I thought I could grab a hold of my stream of urine. So she left pretty soon after that.
He asked me how france is treating me
Tell him you got so much dick you may never come back to the US. That ought to keep him away
I can't give advice right now, I have a yeast infection.
He doesn't like Sabbath and that alone is a GIANT red flag. Learn from my experiences and never, I mean NEVER associate with people that hate Black Sabbath and Motörhead.
I have a whole new respect for her. She chugged half a bottle of jack daniels, and then peed all over his wall. Serves him right.
Randomize