Me= Watching Ferngully. My neighbor= Having really loud sex including multiple orgasms
Oh God
I know, but the worst part is I'm not really sure which I'd rather be doing. Feel free to re-evaluate our friendship
There is a reason Crest White Strips don't list masturbation as one of the myriad of activities to do while whitening your teeth. A very good reason.
due to concerns over safety, the theme of the 'naked fondue party' has now been changed to the 'naked fondue party with optional apron' please b.y.o.apron. extra prizes for most creative apron.
plus shes a stripper, ive been with strippers, if you fuck this up your penis will never forgive you
We're playing fucking games. GAMES. THIS IS BULL SHIT. IM GOING TO THROW UP ON THE BABIES AND LEAVE.
I just found our entire wall-to-wall from September 2006 printed out and clipped... it's 49 pages. Blackout me is so considerate of bored-at-work me
Let's just rave with boners that last for hours
i dont trust my judgment anymore so im only going to fuck guys who can donate blood at the red cross. they have standards.
I just threw up 34 cents. What in god's name did we do last night?
Going to put that on my resume. "Only accidentally snapchatted my titties to all of my friends once."
side note: on a scale of 1-10, how bad an idea is it to hook up with 9 cats guy?
You were trust falling into bushes
I'm pretty sure I regained my virginity last night
Do you think Root Touch Up or Just for Men would work better on pubes?
How was it?
i think i smell bacon but im to sore to walk downstairs. that kinda night
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