My booty call said shes done doing the walk of shame. Wtf is that?
It's what anyone that sleeps with you, specifically, does when they leave. Some do it even when they just think of you.
normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
the young, male pastor of my church has a jesus fish tramp-stamp. I made him show me.
I had sex with him, and then he gave me a $5 Starbucks gift card. Totally worth it
I just peed on my pajamas. Its gonna be a long night. Don't forget the cookies.
i just feel like it would be irresponsible for you to not have sex with me again.
My vagina agrees.
hey did i steal that bike before or after the ball dropped, casue i might have broken my resolution already
she was masturbating to a video of herself masturbaing. She's a keeper
My roommate says its rare that you can be tear gassed before you lose your virginity so i feel accomplished in life
Just cause I'm shitfaced wasted every night waking up in random beds all over Manhattan does not mean I'm a mess.
Truth. Respect the hustle.
If i'm forever fucked up in this state of mind then I'm going to kill him for this
Yeah! Just remind me to. I'll also bring the blow up penis
Look, all I'm saying is that you're going to be a great Vodka Mom.
was that the third sophomore you've banged this week?
third one in three days
But I only have 2 emotions angry and horny
Randomize
