Im eating ham and mustard naked, watching south park, but its totally cool cuz the paper plate is covering my nuts
why does he think he needs to feed/take me out to get some ass? we are at a bar wasting my fucking time
so i just calculated it and i would need to score 150% on this final to pass
And I'm supposed to be surprised that you got another concussion?
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I think I pulled my groin stumbling back from the bar. That or the hippo I woke up next to.
she sent me pictures of 3 different vaginas and if I could pick which one was hers i could sleep with her.
I was always good at matching as a child.
15 year-old stoners have those problems. we're college students dude. dont be like that...
She needs sedatives and a leash
I just want to make out with him forever
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I was dreaming of a parallel reality and in the dream I just looked up at my present self and was like "you're high, man"
He is a sweet angel sent from dick heaven!
Who wakes up at 9 and says "let me send a pic of my dick to my ex gf"
HE WILL NEVER BE ONE OF US. HE WILL NEVER BE A DECENT, GOD-FEARING WHORE.
I love you, and I just washed my hair in my work sink with handsoap.
Setting myself up for trouble? Yes. But getting laid is a lot more important at this time.
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