You know your in college when you decide house chores with games of beer pong...
my being single is dangerous.
I'm gonna laugh so hard when we're both married with families
That statement alone makes me laugh so hard.
Watching intervention at a bar. Who let this happen??
Haha o man how much you've grown. From beer bonging wine and wearing cargo shorts to well, beer bonging beer and wearing cargo shorts
ok... i just had to be reminded that people in animal costumes were feeding me shots at the bar.
Life lesson today, a six foot hot guy I meet at a party CANNOT fit on my bike with me.
I'm pretty sure I just woke up to one of the airport janitors saying that she wanted to tie me up and do something.. I couldn't hear what, thank god
I woke up to him yelling "WHO SLEEPS WITH A BEER IN THEIR HAND?!?" this of course, startled me awake and made me spill the aforementioned beer. So I guess the a answer is- not this girl, not anymore. Asshole
Goldenshlager is a hell of a drink. And these are the adventures ur missing out on w me. I gave someone a bath Emily. A BATH.
Awkward
Can't say I wouldn't let it happen again.
Did I really drink that whole bottle of Jack Daniels last night?
Heroically.
So i had a lucid dream about blowing myself. This is why people love me
Sigh. I haven't seen a dick since August 22nd. And in case you forgot, it's January.
Today, this cop risk his life to save me from a sink hole but all I could do is laugh, I was so stoned
That was before I lit my hair on fire
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