If he doesn't notice me by the next party, i'm just gonna go up to him and pll his pants down and blow him.
Sounds like a plan.
dude, showing up drunk to physics was the best idea ever. I just tripled my participation for the semester. I love st pattys day
He'd bedazzaled his ass. Im not even that gay...
You hooked up with another girl while you were with me. You were literally holding my hand while you did it.
She liked to slap me in the face while she was on top. All I can say is that big boobs can excuse a lot.
I sent him pictures of just me in my thong and he replied "you're so sweet, you make me feel special <3".... Oh.
I don't even know man. I was to busy having beer showered on me and grabbing some balls
I'm tripping balls on ambien right now and I still feel that's a bad idea.
omg he is no good in bed, bless his little heart and his big dick
Got my parents to pick me up from the party, take me to the bar and buy all my drinks, then drop me off at my booty calls house.
someone wrote my own number down on my hand and then call me.
Either she's trying to smother me and failing, or she just has a really bad sense of where her tits should go.
Everyone is out there getting real jobs and I just realized I've been "washing" my clothes with fabric softener for two months.
Lets just put it this way. Im meeting his nana after a mind blowing orgasm.
And on the first day of my adult job, I matched with one of my co workers on tinder...
Randomize
