oh well we may not be friends on facebook but at least i got laid
yeah...it smells like an asshole would smell if someone ate sewage.
Don't worry. I just took 2 benadryls and beat off. I'm practically sleep texting
Its like everytime i see you, my vagina gets a heartbeat.
I'm fucked up. I can't drink anymore. We stole a cat.
There is a literally infinite number of spliffs going around this table.
Delicious
I feel like I'm at a sushi bar with a spliff belt.
The best part about living in a college town is the annual rush of senior girls who want to get in their lesbian experiment before they graduate.
I vaguely remember making out with his tattoo (?) and giving him an awesome massage and then I passed out on his floor. Shrug
I don't even know man. I was to busy having beer showered on me and grabbing some balls
What are you doing? Because if it happens to be drinking, or even any activity that rhymes with "drinking", I'll be over in 5.
I'm so glad you support me having casual sex with your uncle
Your actions as of last night have earned you over thirty new nicknames.
Yeah. I'm so over work, that I'm not even satisfied pretending to work anymore. I just flat out want to go home. Fuck this job
Are you trying to say I've made an emotionally well rounded transformation similar to the Grinch?
According to Joseph, last night I crawled into bed and told him to pretend I'm his French maid, and then started speaking with a German accent, and referring to his manbits as "ze greatest Weiner schnitzel I'd ever seen". Basically, last night was a roaring success.
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