There's a woman here that looks like a cross between Michael Jackson and Flipper.
yeah that pretty much nipped itself in the bud when I realized i could see her whiteheads glowing in the blacklight
Helping high family members not look retarded is what family is for
That's the last time we joust in Radio Flyer wagons after margarita night.
dude, I just walked in on your little brother changing clothes...I'm ashamed to say I noticed, but that kid has as MASSIVE cock...
Yeah...we all know. it's the elephant in the room at family gatherings.
that is a frighteningly accurate metaphor for it.
You seriously need to keep doing my sexting for me. I just said something about "riding cock like a dick rodeo"
I have no idea why I said that. I have no idea why anything happened last night, I broke my toaster making a egg. I'm going to quit drinking.
I threw up sweet potatoes. Worst thing to throw up ever. They came back mashed.
he sent me a pic of his dick and balls out with sunglasses over them like a face. i was at dinner.
do you still have it? i kinda want to see.
Pretty sure I'm going to hell because of our friendship
Last one there wins
I was going to say I needed the exercise but now all I can think about is BJs
My work here is done
I wore a bird inflatable and still got laid. So there's that.
Just so you know, if I get bored tomorrow I WILL pretend to get drunk in the bathroom and crash the whole thing
NO I WILL NOT SET YOU UP WITH MY TWIN WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU?!? JUST BECAUSE I WONT BLOW YOU DOESNT MEAN YOU CAN STALK HER AS A BACKUP PLAN YOU SPANISH BASTARD
You know Sunday Funday was a success when 'puke and rally' came at lunchtime on Monday.
Shriek
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