Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
So... My dad just saw the Plan B package and the beer cans in my backseat.
Oh its cool I'm sure he already knows you're a whore and an alcoholic.
Fact: The drinking you do in college doesn't affect your liver in real life.
do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
sperm doesn't mix with malibu too well
When I was in the bathroom and wiped with a paper towel I found in the trashcan, I realized that this might be the reason I have a yeast infection.
I'm calling it the Friendlationship with Benefits Zone.
Exotic beer tasting at my apt right now and by that I mean I bought random beer and I'm drinking it on my balcony
And to top it off I think that was the first time in history that anyone has used "oh just taking care of her grandmother and doing porn" in the same sentence.
Thank you for caring about my cervix.
I got stoned and explored ice caves with a guy who photographs dildos for a living. I win.
I woke up naked buried in snacks. Best night ever.
How high were you when you left that message, cause you made honest-to-God, credible seal noises.
Hes back in his dorm room dancing naked with 3D glasses on.
and he said that acid doesnt really do anything to him...
Not to be hella graphic on main but I just came so hard I think I saw a new color.
Randomize
