forecast for tonight- shitshow with a chance of tbell
my version of bright and sunny.
we're taking shots every time my dog licks his penis. we're on number 8 now.
you should have been aborted.
She passed out in my bed last night before anything happened. She felt really bad about that, so she gave me head when we woke up this morning.
he acted like he had never seen anyone snort lines of adderall off of a microwave before. freshman.
She pointed at me and told her friend, I'm going to fuck him, its going to be really loud, so yes, i need the whole basement.
after taking her first shot and having her first random hook up she finally feels like she is ready for college
she has no idea
had to bail. she had her cat tattooed on her
FRIENDS DON'T LET FRIENDS WASTE THE LAST ADDERALL.
We were on a plane, I couldn't just grab his dick
I was driving around a golf cart with a keg in the back before I got caught by the cops. First slow speed chase ever
sometimes a perk of being a drug dealer is amazon gift cards. who knew?
So, i might have left my morals back in 2011.
Just had a reminder come up that just said "Ham"
He told me he felt the only proper thing to do was fuck me to the top of the corporate ladder
I had to put my dog down, accidentally outed my brother, and was given a fucking fish sandwich instead of a Big Mac ALL IN ONE DAY! Am I really the person you want to consult for advice? Hhhmmmmmm?
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