That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
I am good. I dancing. Drinking but dancing fine.
im six kinds of drunk right now
I don't even know why I got my vag waxed
Ugh, tell me about it. As each day passes and the hair grows more, I get a little more depressed.
Just got a lapdance on the metro. She said she was on maternity leave and needed the practice.
I dunno if we should get high tonight man. its daylight savings. time travel is just too much for me right now.
You convinced me that eggnog and rum is a great moisturizer.
dude i woke up sitting indian style with my face on the ground and my hand in a bucket of ice.
in a garage, wearing a toga, theyre debating the logistics of Coke Pong. If I don't make it out of here... it was me who stole your Barbie in the 4th grade- I've never forgiven myself.
I'm gonna be a few minutes late, some asshole just fell off the ferry so we had to stop.
I feel like that's something that he should've asked me over dinner..... instead of with his hand down my pants? maybe not
Did you cry?
I don't think so. I definitely lost my cool though
Yeah i think jesus would lose his cool in that situation
He compared my vagina to his favorite T-shirt. I don't know if I should take that as a compliment or not..
I don't think I've ever had this many people offer me blow before. 3 o'clock on a Thursday. I keep good company.
At one point, the bartender wrote out the words "please kill me" on some receipt paper and slid it across the bar to me.
Randomize
