hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
So the bartender just told me that there was numerous people who saw me having sex on the rooftop last weekend. +1
Well some days you just have to get blackout drunk and try to speak Spanish to French Canadian strangers
Dont make this weird.... I was wondering if I could paper mache a few of your dildos this weekend?
I can't believe he let me cut his hair as stoned as I was.. I think I even cut my own hair too
Happiness was finding the hidden Gatorade in the fridge
it wasnt a pity fuck per say. i wasnt attracted to her, but still thought 'that looks like a fun ride'
Great night. I'm in the middle of explaining to her how the stock market works and she just rips my pants off and starts blowing me. Nerdiest blowjob ever.
I'm trying to decide whether it's worth it to masturbate in this gas station bathroom
My mom just sent me this: "I like Jon, but he needs to be the one going down on you! Yeah, we saw your head pop up in your car last night."
If we're single and alone together, the fuck angels shall sing upon our nude bodies.
There aren't enough words in the English language to fully describe how worried I am for your dick. And the rest of you, I suppose.
There's no triumph quite like finally banging your high school boyfriend 6 years later
ever feel bored AND lazy?
I call it "awake" but yeah...
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
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