i hate when u poo a lot and when u wipe theres no poopy residue on the TP. it makes me feel like my butt hole is hiding something from me. just had 2tell sum1.
We're playing Big Buck Hunter to determine who buys the next pitchers. And they said video games wouldn't help me later in life
Being a slut is okay if you're being a polite slut, right?
but then i turned into a human whiteboard because i thought it was a good idea to bring out markers
He kept his baseball cap on when he went down on me...
You started a dance party so that you could steal their vodka and shouted "sailors out!"
His pick up line was "your one sexy pumpkin, I'd love to carve." Why would you let me go home with him?
the party has pretty much ended, it's just 20ish of us jumping and grinding to music from some guy's phone in the corner.
Cops just came and got two guys out of my class. I can't do college. Seriously cannot rage at this school anymore.
But seriously, I hug most of my drug dealers.
And is it bad that I haven't talked to guys who I haven't already dated? I feel like a recycle bin.
I'm too stoned to come over for sex
Yes that is a Krispy Kreme doughnut on my cock
I'll be right over
Now I just sit back and wait to give ass birth to pure evil.
COME AND FUCKING GET ME I AM IN SOME SORT OF JUNKYARD!!!
What, That's like a total 7 inches of cock and 6 are from Joe. Don't be mad at me because you had the lamest orgy ever.
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