Like my Aunt Merial always says ... big dicks, big dicks.
I am stoned and watching Pocahontas. I am letting the kids eat whatever they want. I am the best babysitter in the whole wide world
i had a headache and asked the kid next to me for aspirin. he gave me esctacy instead. gotta love college.
I know you didn't add your TWO random hook ups from the weekend to your FB friends AND change your status to "Good Catholic Girl" on the same day.
he kept his composure pretty well until he puked on the cop car
it's like a replay of two fridays ago...except not in a motel and i'm not having sex in the shower.
I've got my laundry in the car, tonights 1 night stand pre-req is an in suite washer and dryer. Let's do this!
I had no idea a 5'8 girl could fit entirely on her knees in front of the passenger seat of a Sunfire, but I am very happy to now have that knowledge.
Hypothetical question: how bad would bacardi be as an IV drip?
death...100% death...what r u planning.
He also turned out to be underage (the fucking liar) so we had to get drunk on cooking sherry
This medicine is making me nuts. I just woke up and I thought I was in a glass case with Asians staring at me.
I look over and the both of you are naked, and he's eating chicken nuggets off the floor
if having to see my ex’s dick once in a while is the price I pay to the universe for making my life go a little smoother, I’ll take it
We'll handle his penis the same way we handle day drinking; together.
Is it still sex if there's no nudity, no orgasms, but the neighbors bang on the wall and ask you to stop? I've honestly forgotten.
Randomize
