? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
yeah that facebook group of people who have had sex with me probably isn't to discreet...
I love my grandma, but if I have to sit and watch one more show on Bravo, I'm gonna burn her fuckin house to the ground
I'm microwaving a frozen bottle of Two Buck Chuck while watching The Proposal with my housemate. I'm not sure what success is like, but I'm fairly confident this isn't it.
we're like Indians of the 21st century. trading not for food and survival but personal gain and by trouble you mean getting daytime drunk and going to the roller ring then yes.
she broke my one feeling. seriously I think she broke my dick.
Ok how about tonight me and you get laid together. Same girl. Then she signs our dicks.
As weird as it sounds I would totally be down
In case you wake up wondering why your eyes hurt... You were claiming to be Zeus and that mortal weapons couldn't harm you. Some chick took it as a challenge and pepper sprayed you. Sorry dude.
dont eat that thats our sex nutella.
An d I'd rather cry while putting a waffle in my mouth than cry on my pillow, ya feel me?
I am buying anal lube, an enema, and a bag of kit kats. What part of this is compelling the Walgreens woman to tell me to "be well".
He used pronouns for his penis while sexting. I don't know what I did to deserve this.
I'm good. Got my nipples pierced and threw my back out. 🙌
you should come have a drink with me (non alcoholic or otherwise) im at the same bar as your sister and a few guys that would apparently "lick your butthole"-congratulations
Randomize
