3:47a: I take it you're not on your way over
It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
At what point did I decide it would be a good idea to fill my contact case with vodka
We thought you were crowd-surfing until we realized it was the bouncers throwing you out
I'm sick of being broke. I had vicodin and frosting for lunch.
Why were you having sex on top of my left over pizza in the kitchen?
She fell out the car soaking wet and screaming "im wearing a fedora!" then tryed to seduce him on the front lawn in front of his middle aged neighbor
Just caused a nice traffic jam while trying to park at Costco. Too high to drive.
this speak and spell drinking game will be the death of us all.
Plus, I've always wanted to drive in rush hour with a huge cock drawn on my hood
Hung over and there is no way in the world I can make this mess look good today. Only solution is to stay drunk.
So when this rash is gone wanna hang out?
This lady gave me four cups to go along with my gallon of daiquiri. Silly girl, all I need is a straw.
ok now I feel liek a very drunk human instead of a chaos being thanks water
Get the fuck in, we're going to Taco Bell.
Randomize
